Pretending in performance
wrapped in rhyme, each word
draped in red and gold threads,
you believe yourself invisible
behind the brocade of your poetry.
False lines scripted onto the page,
weaving patterns of
life and longing,
love and loss,
peace and pain,
hope and horror:
all fabricated from whole cloth.
No director in the dark behind the scenes
nor puppeteer beyond the curtain
pulling heartstrings, you.
With every rhyme, every weave
of word threaded with the color of life,
the curtain of your theatre parts a bit more
and the spotlight shines brighter on your stage,
revealing the actor who has not lived at all.
whoosh. wow. tell it like it is.
ReplyDeleteCataclysmic, decisive literary smackdown.
ReplyDeleteHoly crap.
Superficial verse pales in the face of ferocious eloquence.
ReplyDeleteNicely done Patti.
ReplyDeleteHa! I know this guy, well all of them!
ReplyDeletei dont want to be that guy...well not always...too much living to do...
ReplyDeleteWow.
ReplyDeleteTrue, my friend. Though if some can write without the feeling, is it always bad. I know that the truth behind the words can be felt and makes for better prose, but not always.
You sound miffed my friend. Pretty sure there is real life behind this one.
Oh, those facades...
ReplyDeleteWow. Loved it! :)
ReplyDeleteWell done. You've described every thinking poet's worst nightmare.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely to be guarded against. Great, hard hitting words.
ReplyDeleteOh yeaa!! When it's not from the heart, it's just too fake to be called poetry!
ReplyDeleteBlunt and direct - I liked this a lot, Patti!! And I share your sentiment!
Have been missing you for a while now, my friend... and am GLAD to see you back with a bang!!
"and the spotlight shines brighter on your stage,
ReplyDeleterevealing the actor who has not lived at all..."
what a powerful ending to a compelling poem! you have a way of reaching deep down into the heart and bringing the dross to the surface...so well done again my friend! sometimes poetry, like life, hurts.
Snap! A real zinger here! You've described precisely what disappoints me whenever I read something by a "poet" who fails to live fully.
ReplyDeleteWe are never invisible behind the brocade of our poetry. We will always be revealed as the actor who has not lived at all. This is dynamite!
ReplyDeletethis is excellent....
ReplyDeleteMasterfully wrought work. Excellent use of traditional - for me - structure, with a good pseudo-end-twist.
ReplyDeleteExcellent Patti...and an actor like many that did not live at all....wonderful work and good to see you back...bkm
ReplyDeleteWow! "revealing the actor who has not lived at all" ... blunt ... extremely well done verse, Patti.
ReplyDeleteBet you think I forgot about. Nope! Just for weeks in bed followed by two weeks of birthday celebrations.
Catching up now. Hope all is well with you and yours.
yep - i prefer "my" poets broken and real..
ReplyDeleteA compelling poetry and your words in the beginning got me hooked...
ReplyDelete'you believe yourself invisible
behind the brocade of your poetry. '
how true.. your ending was perfect too.
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/03/whispers-winter-dew.html
Twitter @VerseEveryDay