New Listing! 10 Rms, Gdn Vu

This gem is too good to be true!  
Seller very motivated!

large Victorian family home
filled with charming echoes from years past,
(pay no mind to the screeches, 
moans and thumps;
these old houses often make weird noises 
when a cold wind blows.)

situated on large lot
in peaceful neighborhood,
planted with fruit trees and garden
(blooming with abandon, 
forget-me-nots forgotten).

wide, wraparound front porch
with romantic porch swing, 
built for young lovers
(just bit forlorn, sagging under the weight 
of duplicity and confrontation,
and silent tears shed late at night).

welcoming living room, 
perfect for entertaining,
with large stone hearth fireplace
swept and cleaned
(but littered with ashes of burned trust).

eat-in family kitchen,
overlooking lovely pergola draped with lilacs
(all remnants of pancakes and bacon, 
laughter and love long gone; 
shattered tableware and 
togetherness swept into the bin).

large master bedroom,
newly painted in soothing colors,
mirrored wall reflecting large bay window
(and the ghosts of 
angry words and broken promises).

don’t miss this opportunity!
vacant and ready to sell, 
occupants have moved on
(except for the lady buried beneath the lilacs,
and she won’t be much of a bother at all).


  1. Patti, I don't know whether to be sad or scared...I guess a little of both. This is nicely done :) Makes me glad to be here.

  2. haha....love the commentary through out...lol..way to tell a story...and my how those flowers will grow...smiles. nice one shot!

  3. I just LOVE October!
    You Rock Pattie Cake...G

  4. Wow, the ending is a shocker!!

  5. Those flowers will grow really well :)

  6. Nice balancing act between vague spookhouse-ness and human dramas acted out over time and moods; timely, clever work that spans mulitple levels of meaning and genre(s).

  7. Oh, my. What stories are hidden within the silencing muffler of walls and shuttered windows. Perhaps glass houses might improve the world.

  8. What a fun and unique look at an old house, skeletons in the closet (or under the lilacs) and all. Good one shot.

  9. So creative! Fun and scary at the same time. I love this one!

  10. Very amusing...the whole often lack of truth in advertising...where "older home with lots of potential" actually means (picture Bette Davis here) "What a dump." Ha!

  11. Patti, I'm enjoying reading your poetry on One Shot. Your poems are always so creative, and you always seem to put together important themes in novel ways. New Listing makes me reflect on the fact that all these homes being lost daily are really lost livelihoods and spirits. thanks, my friend.

  12. A great piece of black comedy. Funny and scary, both.

  13. Highly original - the story behind the facade - how very true and wonderfully written! Loved it.

  14. Hey, it's just a little lived in. Ok, maybe a little died in too.

  15. 'If these walls could talk' - eh, Patti? Let's hope the new tenants can exorcize the past and breathe new life (and love) into the house.

  16. I wondered as I read what happened to the previous occupants. The last 2 lines told me alright! Creepy!

  17. What a fun creative mind you have. I loved this poem. I have friends with an old Victorian home they are thinking about putting on the market, I need to send them here to read your poem. Loved it.

  18. Thank you for your visits and comments, Everyone.

    I've always been fascinated by "real estate speak." If you read enough of the ads (something o=f a hobby; yeah, I know, weird), you begin to understand the lingo. You know, "cozy" means small as hell. "Fixer-upper" means a total disaster. you know. So I decided to play with it a bit.

    I wondered when I wrote this if readers would pick up on the swings between sadness and sarcasm, playfulness and tragedy.

    I guess I needn't have worried.

  19. I love this, such a great "real-estate" type ad in effects of history and emotion! (I could not help but like the forget-me-nots as my oneshot had those too! =D same muse??? lol) Great work! =)) ~April

  20. I love the metronome effect, the balance, the kinetic energy that ties your words together.

  21. Betweenhearts75: Thank you for visiting. I loved the stanzas in your entry featuring the forget-me-nots. Same muse for sure!

    Ti: Thank you, my friend. It's so nice to have you back.

  22. Patti - No way am i getting a vacancy in this beautiful house, it kind of scared me..as much as i have been assured the lady beneath won't be a bother, i still wouldn't settle in there with all the creepy sounds but what a sales speech Patti..Brilliant piece!

  23. When we were looking for our first house, I wondered what stories we'd hear if the house could do the talking ... think you just answered that. Well done, my friend. Congratulations!


Thoughts? I would love to hear from you.