7/08/2012

Détente


Soon enough. 

Overhead
stitching the sky in black lace
circling beady eyes on the prize
dipping darting fighting each other off
each intent on scoring the best morsels
salivating...

Below
battered and weakened by a string
of dark days hanging heavy
by a thread woven of pain
unable to move without a stumble
persevering...

Just not now.


***

Linked at dVerse Poets Pub

21 comments:

  1. Beautiful and ominous, Patti. The image is spooky:)I like the contrast of "one day...just not now" , a relief against the content of the poem.

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  2. Eeeek, I want to be overhead. Below is scary!

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  3. nice...i really like the structure of this...interesting perspectives as well....they are coming for you...keep persevering...smiles...

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  4. Mmm...I like how you put this together. It packs a lot of power into just a few words. Keep persevering, I always say.

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  5. What a picture! I'm rooting for those below but recognize the need for those above in the scheme of things.

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  6. Wow… this is fantastic, Patti. It took me on a time-traveling adventure, right back to a poem I wrote that shares the same name.

    Perspective. It’s a magnificent thing.

    I love the final sentence…

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  7. PattiCake...
    Friday 13th
    FF55 returns
    I'd LOVE to see you...G

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  8. ooh. what's it mean? I like it though.

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  9. Why oh why Patti, am I 'seeing' the human race as I read your well-crafted thought-words, and glance at those patient Peeps-in-waiting.

    Good work!
    Steve

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  10. you are amazing. This truly touched me. Very intense use of words.

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  11. Dear "car loans" - I suspect you are spam, but you said nice things, so you can stay.

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  12. Awww... such is the way of life and... death. Good for the hungry, bad for the food.
    Chilling but powerful in its imagery Patti, great write!

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  13. its pretty funny patti...the spammers are making actual comments now...smiles...got a few myself the last couple days...but they are commenting on content though..huh, go figure....always good to see you ma'am

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  14. Nice format and interesting thoughts...I feel something dark is coming ~ Great to see you ~

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  15. Great write on the struggle of life and death. Very vivid and real. Nice one! Gritty, but nicely done!

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  16. A strong write here, Patti! Thought-provoking fare!

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  17. There are always vultures willing to circle and go for the weak, in nature and in life. Great capture!

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  18. This is really good, Patti. I really like the imagery, the vibe of it. This line is killer - 'stitching the sky in black lace.' LOVE IT!!!!

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Thoughts? I would love to hear from you.