Ma and Pa Plan Saturday's Outing

(My apologies to all my redneck friends.  You know I love you more'n my luggage.  But who could resist?)

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“Aw come on, Ma… It’ll be fun. You’ll see.”

“Them goins-on is just unseemly. I ain’t getting’ out in no field with a bunch of Yankees, all acting like damn fools.”

“But goll-ee, seed spittin’... That’s my best thing. I could take the gold.”

"Seed spittin’? Well, hay-ull, whyn’t you say so? Let’s go, Pa.”

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Writ up for Friday Flash 55 in the hopes that it'll perk up ol' G-Man, who been feelin' puny this week. Hope you're feeling better, G.

The Pig

This poem was posted on The Writer's Almanac, by American Public Radio and Garrison Keillor.  It's just too good not to share.

Photo by Kim Newberg (PublicDomainPictures.net)

         The Pig

by Anonymous

It was the first of May

A lovely warm spring day

I was strolling down the street in drunken pride,

But my knees were all a-flutter,

And I landed in the gutter

And a pig came up and lay down by my side.

Yes, I lay there in the gutter

Thinking thoughts I could not utter

When a lady passing by did softly say

'You can tell a man who boozes

By the company he chooses'

And the pig got up and slowly walked away.

The Pig by Anonymous. 

Public domain.